Spoiler Biggest douche in Skyrim

[-Mir-]

hmmm. I agree Nazeem and Njada Stonearm. And Braith. No one likes a bully! >P

And I guess Mikael the bard sort of, lol

 

[imaginepageant]

Farengar Secret-Fire. Why? Talk to him. It's pretty obvious.

 

[SherlockJones]

I'm going to roll with mercer frey on this one.

He's just so pretentious, it's like bethesda went to their designers " if you don't create the cockiest p***k you can think of, we'll staple your eyelids to your lips"

I HATE that guy

 

[Aliurtuq]

I vote for Degaine. He gets drunk off of other people's coin and doesn't even bother with a simple, "Thanks".

 

[Zolo-Shea]

Baalgruf the Greater made it pretty clear to me that the only way to learn more about the Thu'um is to seek council from the mysterious "Greybeards" who live up on the biggest mountain in Skyrim. It's a bit of a trek, but I eventually come to a small village at the foot of the mountain, called Ivarstead. I check out the inn so I can learn more about High Hrothgar while putting on a serious buzz at the same time. A gentlemen by the name of Bassianus Axius is keeping me company by the fire, and he's telling me what little he knows about the Greybeards. Well, after a couple drinks and a few jokes, I decided it's time to tackle the mountain. As I'm getting up to leave, I hear my new buddy Bassianus Axius say (rather loudly,) "What a boring conversation."

I froze in my tracks.

What did he just say? Why, that two-faced pompous ass! I can't believe I spent all that time thinking we were chums when it was clearly the other way around. Fortunately, I've found that lightning teaches manners faster than any other method. Now a corpse, he won't be mocking any more dragonborns.

 

[Wildroses]

Bassianus Axius always lives when I play Skyrim. He needs to be alive to experience the humiliation of Fastred dumping him for Klimmek. Gee I wonder who persuaded Klimmek to be more assertive and snatch that two faced pompous ass's girlfriend away from him?

I just started a new game, and so had to play the intro. How could no one have mentioned the Imperial Captain in this thread yet? Forget the list, she goes to the block are words she should deeply regret.

I'd also like to nominate Ralof. It would have been so easy for you to say I wasn't with the rebels, you jerk! They probably would have decided to execute me anyway, but you could have at least tried! At least Hadvar tried to save me. Not very hard, true, but he did try, and that's more than you did!

Although Hadvar's a douche as well.

Captain: Forget the list. She goes to the block.
Hadvar: By your orders, Captain. I'm sorry...
Me: YOU'RE sorry? How the #$%! do you think I feel?!
Hadvar:...we'll make sure your remains are returned to your homeland.
Me: I hope you'll forgive me for being completely underwhelmed by this generous assurance.

Then if you follow him he won't shut up about joining up. The Imperial Army just tried to chop off my head for being in the wrong place and the wrong time. I do not want to join them, Hadvar. Stop telling me to take a carriage to Solitude!

 

[Neriad13]

Paratus Decimius, from the Mages' College quest in Mzluft. Now, normally I'm a reasonable person. I rarely kill rude NPCs just for the sake of killing them. I see some value in every single person I run into. But this guy...this guy tests me. After I successfully get his pet project running entirely on my own, he sees the Eye of Magnus's location back in the College and immediately threatens to bust down the doors to find out what we've got in there. Whenever he opens his mouth, all I can hear is him saying "Kill me, kill me right now, would you please? I really ought to be dead." I've got to say, it was hard for me, a reasonable woman who will always play nonviolently in any game that allows it, to walk away from him without setting him on fire. Not to mention that he really and truly doesn't seem to care that every single one of his research associates are dead. Nope, who cares about them? It's not like they had families, outside lives. He's just got to get this thing working, dammit!

 

[Psiberzerker]

Farengar Secret-Fire. Why? Talk to him. It's pretty obvious.

How did I forget him? Oh yeah, because I've been avoiding him for months. Yes, I keep cutting you off so you'll get on with it, not go on a long ramble about me wanting you to get on with it. nasty case of Mad Trapper Disorder on that one, I get the feeling people don't talk to him much. And all his angsterbaiting about the personal challenges of his profession, WTF cares? Go back to high rock. It's almost worth doing The Whispering Door for the chance to cut his throat. I savescummed until I got the proper animation despite the fact that I wasn't playig a Stealth character at all. And that was only because the game doesn't let you strangle him bare handed, and leave him with his mouth full of Muffle scrolls.

Oh, and did I mention I dislike him?

 

[Raijin]

I vote for Degaine. He gets drunk off of other people's coin and doesn't even bother with a simple, "Thanks".

Oh come on that guy is pretty fricken funny! Hes my favorite beggar

 

[Commodus]

Ulfric.
A brutish, segregationist cockroach.
I was very happy when my Dark Elf ran him through. I only wish I could have dragged his corpse to the 'Grey Quarter' so the locals could truly express their grief at the passing of the 'King'.

 

[-Mir-]

Oh, just thought of another one. Lemkil.

 

[Pijack]

That guy who hates Dark Elves. Something Stone-Fist. I never lose the opportunity to kick his ass. So much for Stone-Fist. It just irks me that he is essential for no reason. Any way I can kill him via console?

 

[Hale Loneshadow]

Mikael the bard in Whiterun...c'mon, that guy is just a huge sack of douche with everything he says.

 

[Mr1cammando]

Faendel and Sven.

She isn't interested in either of you!!